Stand Tall in Your Story Reflection
Speaker 1: (singing).
Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Hello, this is Rebecca Fleetwood Hession, host of The Badass Womens Council Podcast. I'm super glad that you are here. So who was at the April 20th Stand Tall in Your Story event, either live or virtual? My goodness, did that just absolutely blow my mind and all of my expectations. So, if you were there, thank you, because it was your energy that made that night magical, just being in the room together. And if you weren't there, good news, we're going to be publishing these stories and some of the action on a series of podcast episodes coming up in the future. So have no fear, you'll get a chance. Okay, so today, I have a special reflection episode for you, because as we know, it's our reflection plus the connections that we make that provide the direction we need in our life and our career. And it's also completely on brand with the Rise& Thrive Experience and the Stand Tall in Your Story event. So, the Stand Tall in Your Story event is the culmination of a seven month journey that seven women go through together, and at the end of that seven months, the event is them in a TED- like talk for seven minutes sharing their story. And the Rise& Thrive Experience is really unique in that we, as Thrive guides, myself, as well as three other women, Nicole Busch, Alex Perry, and Alissa Bartenbach, We walk these women through a journey over seven months that isn't really about learning new skills, per se. It's not like we say," Okay, here's how to do leadership, or here's how to do Excel." We walk them through a seven month experience of helping them learn how to listen to their inner knowing, and what we call our story. And a part of that is really shedding some of the layers that we have that we've acquired over our lifetime from parents, education, prior careers, jobs, bosses, it's really shedding those layers that have created this white knuckle control we try to have on our lives. So instead, we want to help these women learn how to shed other people's expectations and societal norms that keep us driving, struggling, and stuck. It's less about living out of someone else's script and more about us writing our own story, because it's really not awards, or degrees, or performance reviews that give us real food for our soul. We want to learn to listen to our inner knowing and our soul, and our instincts, and our intuition, and just who we are to guide us more intentionally. And so, because of that, because shedding the layers is a big part of that experience to reveal the essence of your uniqueness, I want to guide you today on some reflection questions to help you shed some of those layers, help you peel that back a little bit and get to that, what I call the essence of our uniqueness, where we find those tiny embers glowing at the bottom of our heart, where the love lives. Because too often, we cover it all up with what we think we should be doing, or what other people have told us we should be doing. And once we start to see and feel and understand those tiny embers glowing at the bottom of our heart, then we can connect with others and help them fan the flame of those, with and for us, because that's what living in community is really about, fanning the flames of those embers for each other. So let's jump into some reflection questions. Now, let me tell you, if you're new here and you haven't been through one of our reflection episodes, I'm going to ask a series of questions, and I'm going to give just a little small pause in between each one, but then you can pause the episode on your device and spend as much time as you need thinking about, journaling about these questions. All right. Are you ready? So again, this is about shedding the layers, peeling back other people's expectations and societal norms. So the first one is, what expectations about success or a great life did you learn in school? What did you learn in school that set expectations for you about what success should and could look like? Take a minute on that one. And the follow- up question is what is or isn't serving you today about those? What do you want to keep, and what might you want to shed? Next question. What were your parents, or your family, whoever you called family, what was their view of success or expectations of you growing up? And again, the follow- up is, what is or isn't serving you today about that? I mean, y'all, we all love our family. Well, not all, not everybody does love their family. A lot of people love their family and have mad respect for them, but we are all unique. And so, what worked for mom, dad, grandma, Uncle Joe, Aunt Barb, it doesn't mean that's your path, and so it's time to ask yourself what is or isn't serving you about those expectations that were put upon you, or that you chose to take on from your family? Next question. Have you been given any feedback from any aspect of your career or anywhere, that may or may not be serving you well today? I want to reflect back to the talk that Lindsay Tjepkema gave last year at the Stand Tall in your Story event, and I'll link that in the show notes for you. It's like I said, just a seven minute talk, so I highly recommend that you listen to it. But the title of her talk was Boldly be Yourself, and a large theme of that was her trying to live up to the expectations of every boss that she'd had from the time she left college and went into the workforce, even prior to her career, in her education. And some of the feedback that she got wasn't at all helpful. It wasn't in tune with who she wanted to be, and that happens sometimes because again, we're all created to be unique. And so, I want you to think back on have you been given any feedback that isn't serving you well, or is? Sometimes that is helpful to carry forward, but we're really talking about shedding layers today. So what do we need to let go of? Is there a piece of feedback that you've received that you think," Yeah, that's just not helpful to me in where I'm headed?" And the follow- up question is, what will it take for you to really let go of that? Because those messages that we get throughout our lives become part of our subconscious, and our autopilot, and our narrative. And so, in order to flip the script, we need some intention put to how we're going to shift that and change that, so it doesn't continue to play on autopilot. So how are you going to change that? Okay, next question. What worked well for you in past jobs, careers, or just earlier chapters of your story, that you don't want to carry forward, that just no longer serves you? I'll give you an example from my life. For a long time, I was rewarded and I felt the need to have every single detail figured out, to be an inbox zero, to just check all the boxes, and then create more lists, so I could check more boxes. And there was a season, there were several chapters in my life, a full season of my life that that was necessary and worked well, but in the chapters I'm in now, it just doesn't, because that level of detail and scrutiny is stifling too much of my creativity and my innovation. And so, I've had to either outsource some of those details, or just let go of them and realize it just wasn't worth spending the time, energy, and effort that I was putting into it. So again, the question is what has worked well for you in previous aspects of your careers, other jobs, but you just don't want to carry that forward? And the follow- up question is, how are you going to ensure that you make that shift? I'll give you an idea. One way to do that is journaling and writing. The process of putting words to the page engages a part of your brain that helps you make that shift, but then also speak it out loud. There's so much power in the spoken word, and we have that noted from neuroscience, from the Bible, all the things. So think about it, write it down, and then speak it and ask yourself instead of those things, what's more important to you? Why does that matter to make the shift? Getting to a place of why it matters, is a powerful aspect of change. Okay. That's all the questions for today. If you just listened through the episode today and haven't done the reflections yet, I hope you'll bookmark this and come back to it. I think you'll find this really helpful to, again, shed some of those layers of other people's expectations and societal norms, and start to find that inner knowing of your own instincts and intuition, and the feelings you get about the unique life and career that you want to live. All right, thanks so much for being here. We'll see you next week. inaudible see you, it's a podcast. You know what I mean. Make it a great day.
Speaker 1: (singing)
This week, Rebecca reflects on Stand Tall in Your Story Event. Stand Tall in Your Journey is a seven month journey that seven women go through, together. During these seven months, we walk them through an experience of helping them learn from their inner knowing, and how to shed layers we've acquired from parents, education, jobs, etc. We want to help reveal the essence of your of your uniqueness. Listen now and allow yourself to spend time on Rebecca's reflection questions.