Write Your OWN Story: Thoughts From Writing A Book
Speaker 1: (Singing).
Rebecca Fleetwood Hession: Hello. This is Rebecca Fleetwood Hession, host of the Badass Women's Council podcast. I'm super glad that you're here. There's a high probability that as you are listening to this, my book is finally available on Amazon, and all the places that you buy books. Holy shmolys. Now I say high probability, because this whole book publishing deal, it's like... Have you ever built a house, and they say, oh, you'll be in by Christmas. And you're thinking about all the great Christmas decorations that you'll put up in your new house, and then surprise you're really not going to get in there till Easter. Big projects are like that. Not because anybody's malicious or messes up, just shit happens. We're playing it day by day, but we think it's going to be out on March 17th. Which would be super cool, because St. Patty's day for crying out loud. Who doesn't love another reason to party? It's also my late grandmother's birthday, which would be so fun too. I am going to spend a little bit of time today, telling you about how I'm feeling about the book, some of the backstory. Just ramble a little bit about this and that, about what's on my heart and in my head. Couple of nights ago, after a wildly successful stand tall in your story event that happened on March 8th, please stay tuned for the video of the women's stories. It was epic. Everyone in the audience said it was our best one ever. We just keep getting better and better at knowing how to do this. It's so fun. A couple of nights after that event, I immediately needed to go into marketing for this book. I had already spent as you know, if you follow me, so much time putting info about the event. I started to feel that I'm just sick of me. I'm sick of putting myself out there. Luckily two things. One is I've hired the most amazing marketing agency, Coverdale Consulting. The team there, Rachael Coverdale is founder owner. Claire is my account representative. Andrew who's amazing as Rachel's partner... Without them I couldn't keep going, because they're doing the heavy lifting, and they're also staying very inspiring. Number two is the fact that, why in God's name would I spend more than three years writing this book, if I wasn't willing to do every single thing possible to get it into the hands of the people that I wrote it for? I had to remind myself, hey girl, this ain't about you. You wrote it because you care. You wrote it because you believe that the content in the book will make a difference, and be helpful to your reader. Get over your damn self and keep going. I actually talked to myself like that. That was the conversation I had with myself, and that was helpful. I think it's a good reminder that we need to know... When we want to do big things, which I think most of us deep down want to do big things. It's just whether we're willing to get across what I call in the book, the sea of uncertainty to do it. When we want to do big things, we have to know why we're doing them. Because it's the why that keeps you moving forward, when you start to have those insecurities or doubts, or just get sick of yourself. Know why, know who it's for, and why it matters. That's the case even in your daily task list, quite frankly. One of the things I recommend is to take a look at your calendar appointments, look at your tasks, and ask yourself, who's this for? Why does it matter to them and to me? Those are good questions to keep in your pocket for lots of situations. That's one little rambling thought, about what's happening with the book. Just a little detail in case I forget, just popped into my head. I start recording the audio book next week, which won't be out for probably eight weeks. I don't know. Again, timelines are just ideas, thoughts, maybes. Don't wait to buy the book for the audio book, because it's going to be a minute. I need you to buy the book quite frankly. What else is going on? Another thing about this book process, and putting things into the world that make you feel super vulnerable. It couldn't be a bigger case for building a really strong community of support. I want to give you a little bit of the backstory of the last... Oh gosh, four or five years of my life. Six years ago, I got a divorce after 18 years of marriage. About a year later, I sold the dream house that I had spent lots of time, energy and money building at a 23 acre estate, with couple of ponds, and lakes. A beautiful home that I poured into every single detail, and it wasn't serving my needs anymore. The kids were busy, they were hardly over there. I was rambling around in this big house by myself. It was super cool location, but way out and remote. I wanted to be spending more time with friends, and it was inconvenient. Sold my house, and moved into town, and said to myself, hey, if you get into this new place, and you start feeling like you want to change careers, leave your wildly successful 20 year career and do your own thing, do it. It wasn't days maybe, where my heart just lit up and said, this is a fresh start. This is what we're going to do. I gave a six month notice to my wildly successful career, with FranklinCovey which was a beautiful experience. I started my own thing. Now, here's the thing about starting this thing. I didn't really know what it was going to be. I decided that if I was going to jump into this fresh start, that I was going to do it seeking God ideas, not good ideas. If you hang around here much at all, you know that I ain't afraid to talk about my love for Jesus. The only way that I could build a business with God ideas not good ideas, is spend a lot of time with him. With God. I did training, and keynote speaking, and this and that to keep some money rolling in while I figured it out. I sat every morning in stillness, seeking ideas, answers, healing, from all of the shit that I'd been through over the past few years. For someone which I know is a lot like most of you, that was so accustomed to being phonetically busy. This time in stillness at first was so hard. I wanted answers, I wanted them now. I wanted them by the end of the week. I wanted to know what was next. I wanted a task, list, and a strategic plan. It just doesn't always work that way. What I learned was, I had a lot of healing to do first. That time and stillness was a big part of that healing process. But over a period of a couple of years, I started to get creative and hear ideas. It was in one of those sitting in stillness times, that I got the download to start this rise and thrive seven month experience. It's going to be in its fourth year, starting here in a month or so. To start recruiting for year four, season four. The idea for stand tall in your story... During this whole time I was jotting notes down for the book. I knew I was going to write a book. I have been a writer since I was a child. It's part of my unique gifts and talents. I was jotting ideas and journals, about what this book could be. I started writing it roughly as I was going through this process. As it got clearer, as the ideas for the business got clearer... I also heard the Lord say," I'm going to send you the people that will support you in this journey." Because connection has been such a huge part of my calling. What I know I'm here for is to help people connect to their inner- knowing, what I call our inner thrive guide, and mostly to connect with each other. To build really beautiful communities of support. The Lord said," I'm going to bring you the right people to support you in this journey." As I look around this week thinking about the launch of this book, and having those moments of I'm sick of myself. I realize this week that man, did he come through on that one? I have the most amazing supportive friends and business partners, and I could not be doing the stuff I'm doing right now without that support. That's one of the key points I wanted to make today, is it's a big piece of this puzzle. As I was jotting down notes for the book, I finally got to the point where I was like, I'm ready to write this thing. This was about three years ago. And I did. I wrote the whole dang thing. As I was reading through it, I thought the ideas are there, the things I want to share, but the way it's written sucks. It read like a training manual, because I had come out of the training and development industry. I still wasn't cleansed of that way of thinking and things, and I hated it. I thought, no. I started over, and this was right as quarantine was happening, and all of those things. I started over because I tried to refresh it, and it just was too hard. I thought I'm just going to start over. The concepts are going to be the same, but the approach is going to be different. The second time I wrote this book, kid you not, wrote the entire thing again. Again, ideas were the same, but sounded snarky and mean. I think it was because the world was in such upheaval, and everybody was snarky and mean, and trying to figure out what was going on. I thought, I do have a snarky side. I think we all know that, but that's not all of who I am. The majority of the time I'm annoyingly optimistic. I thought, that's not the brand that you want to put out there. This version that you're going to put in your hands here this week, is the third time I've written this book. So lesson in than that, don't give up, just keep going. It took those first two shady drafts, to get me to the point that I was ready to put it in your hands. I think that's funny when people say, ask me about the book writing process. I'm like, oh, you mean the one I wrote three times. The next book I've learned a lot. I don't think I'm going to have to write it three times. Who knows? We'll see how it goes. I know I'm rambling today, but that's the way my brain feels right now, thinking about the book getting ready to come into your hands. It is what it is. The other thing I wanted to say about community is, one of the thrive guides, [ Alyssa Teo 00:14: 33 ] she came to the event of course, and she lives pretty far away from me. We don't get to see each other live that often. It's just so energizing when you get to be in person with people, especially with an event that's so energetic. What I noticed was as soon as she got back home, she started posting about her book coming out, and she hadn't been really putting herself out there that much. We had had some conversations about that, it was part of the uncomfortableness. She started putting herself out there in really beautiful, authentic ways that are completely showcasing her authenticity. I loved seeing it. It's been about a week. I messaged her yesterday and I said," Oh, I love what you're putting out there." She said," I got so excited and inspired being together at the event, that I knew when I got home, that it was time to put myself out there." That's just another real and practical example, of what happens when we put ourselves in community. When we put ourselves in the midst of other amazing people that are sharing their stories, it just makes us more inspired to share our own. When I say stories, it doesn't have to be a book. It doesn't have to be a podcast. Your story is you and who you are authentically, but it's much more powerful. It's a little bit easier to put yourself out there authentically, when you know you're surrounded by people that love and support you, in really beautiful ways. Here's the deal, I would love you to buy the book. Why should you buy the book? Whose it for? When I talk about whose it for, the main person that I think of when I wrote it is that person like me. Who's had success in their career. Who's gone out there, and given it a shot, and had success, and then all of a sudden thought, this wasn't exactly how I thought it was going to go. The awards are there, the great paychecks there, you're no longer struggling to pay the bills, but there's just something missing. There's that feeling of... I call it thriving. Wellbeing and satisfaction that you're missing, and you're still chasing it. That person that thinks, this next degree, or this next certification, or this next promotion, or this next thing is going to be the thing that gives me satisfaction. It's this act of searching out there, for the answers that are going to solve in here, in our hearts. That's not the way it works. If that resonates with you, the book is for you. The other thing that you'll take away from this book, is a sense of confidence in who you are. There are really key pieces to this around overcoming uncertainty, knowing your unique gifts and talents, and building a career from those. The need for community, which I always hit on here. That's story. That's the first of the three keys to rise and thrive as a badass career woman, which is the subtitle. The second key is money. I talk about money as a necessary commodity, that we need to have education around. Knowing the money making model of your business, knowing your personal money story. If you want to have influence and make a difference in your career, you're going to have to understand the money making model of your business. Then the third key is rhythm. Which is recognizing that there is a ebb and a flow, an emotional flow to our lives, and acknowledging it is the key to not fighting against it. We've spent so much time trying to control everything. Control time, control people, control projects, but it's really about the ups and the downs, and the give and the take, and the ask and receive. Not this wrestle it to the ground control mindset, that we've lived with for far too long. Any of that resonates with you, this book is probably for you. Is it just for women? No. Everything in the book is about humans, but I believe, and it's been my experience that high achieving women have a deep desire to make a difference. Not only to be successful for themselves, but to make a difference in the ripple effect of their life and work. I love putting meaningful ideas into the heads, and hearts, and hands of high achieving women, because I think they do beautiful things with it at home, with their families, their children. I tried to start a charter school about 10, 11, 12 years ago. Something like that. Mostly because my son needed a different type of school. Completely because my son needed a different type of school. In that process, I learned a lot about the way that women see education, the way that women see their career, that women are making a lot of those decisions. I wrote this book for women, because of the influence that I know that we can have in the world. Also, because of the time where we are in the world. With millions of women that left the workforce through the pandemic, through great resignation, we were already on the throws of the burnout diagnosis from the World Health Organization. Women took the biggest hit. We all know that. One of the things I say is on the back of the book is that, millions of women have left the workforce, but they won't stay away. We'll be back. They'll be back, but they're coming back on their own terms. Write Your Own Story is a framework for you to ask yourself a lot of questions about, what are those terms for yourself? I don't know what they are. I know that we've spent too much time thinking that there's a checklist of how to do stuff, and you know what you need. This book is about helping you know the terms that you're coming back with. Maybe you'll start your own business. Maybe you'll go back into working for someone else, but with a different mindset set, and a different set of expectations for what that could and should look like. Its not just for women, but I believe that the concepts, women need them more than ever. I believe that women will lead in a way that focuses on people and prosperity. I care a lot about healthy, robust bottom lines in business, but I also know you don't have to sacrifice the people to get them. I think women are ready for that empathic leadership. They want it. They're willing to give it, to model it, to do it. I don't know, rambling now. That's what's in my head right now. I'm excited. I can't wait to get your thoughts. I would love once you buy the book, and read the book to leave reviews. It's gold for authors for you to write reviews. Think how many times you go to buy a book and you think, let me check and see what other people thought about it. I don't know why my light just went out, but maybe that's God saying, you should wrap this thing up. For you people listening just audio, I'm doing videos now too. My little ring light thing just went off. I don't know what's happening. I totally forgot what I was... Oh, I know what I saying. Reviews. You know how many times that you've gone and looked at a review, to decide if you were going to buy a book. I would love it if you would take a minute, and leave a review for me. Thanks so much. Can't wait to hear what you think about it. Make it a great day.
The Badass Women's Council Podcast is back after a few weeks off for Rebecca's Stand Tall In Your Story event and the release of her book, Write Your OWN Story: Three Keys to Rise and Thrive as a Badass Career Woman.
Today, Rebecca shares her feelings surrounding her book, the process of writing it, finalizing it, and background to what inspired her to write a book. Tune in now!